Alix Karaitis's story, 2003
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Alix Karaitis’s story
I wasn't happy when I was in my lower level family, but that was because I hadn't taken what I was meant to take from the seminars and the rules. Sure, it was borderline brainwashing, but the kids who were smart enough were able to learn from it the right way. I was put in R and R (“Room Restraint”) once, for about a week. It sucked, but it was nothing compared to what I could have been put through in prison. They just made me sit there and be quiet. I was going down a pretty shitty path before, I probably would have been put in prison for abusing my mother. And it took this violent slap to the face for me to realize it. I read all the negative stuff about how Casa was some sort of fucking teen gulag, and I shake my head. It was bad, it deprived us of a normal teenage-dom, but it honestly wasn't anything illegal. I think the people who say they were abused and that this place was so horrific that the people who made the seminars should be put on trial are overreacting. I'm definitely not a brainwashed idiot, but I don't think I would have chosen any differently. I was one of the few who CHOSE to go to the program. My mom told me about it, and I willingly went there. I'm not giving the program all the credit, but like I say, it was the slap in the face I needed to be able to turn my life around on my own. Before going to the program, I wasn't suicidal, but I really didn't think I deserved to live. I thought that all the kids who made fun of me were right and that I was a horrible person. I was also undiagnosed bipolar. If I hadn't gone to the program, I could have ended up in a mental institution, somewhere that I REALLY could have gotten abused, REALLY gotten restrained. So what if I spent a month in worksheets straight? I got four years of high school done in two. The methods were a bit on the extreme side, but if I hadn't gone, who knows what turns my life would have taken. I credit the program for being the wake-up call that I needed to realize that I wasn't a lousy sack of shit and to take control of my own life. I know there was abuse in other programs run by WWASP, but in the over two years I spent there, the worst treatment I received was disrespect. And if not for the things I learned, I would still feel like I was a worthless piece of shit, and I can almost guarantee that I'd still be undiagnosed bipolar, and that I'd probably be in a mental ward or prison for doing something despicable. No, Casa itself didn't save my life, but it gave me the time to really look, to REALLY delve deep into what I was doing and how I was feeling and what choices I was making for my life. It gave me that time, cliche as it is, to "stop" and "choose" something different. If I'd continued on in "normal" life, perhaps the doors I've currently gone through in my life never would have opened because I never would have stopped and looked for them. So no, Casa itself didn't save my life. But it helped me to save my own.
High Impact was abuse, yes, I won't deny that. I've done a lot of delving into the information about Casa & High Impact, but I honestly don't think that there's any reason for me to, for example, be any sort of a part of a class action lawsuit towards Casa. I didn't get abused. I have heard stories of the bad shit that happened on the boys side, and I respect whatever they want to do to get closure from that. I honestly don't see it as dehumanizing, they did it to bring us all down to the same level, because I know a lot of us had superiority complexes or thought we were hot shit or something. To take away all personalizations helps us to get down to the root of who we REALLY are. I'm not talking about High Impact at all. I don't connect that to Casa other than the fact that I know a couple of people--like you--were sent there FROM Casa. I also never said it was perfect, so don't think that I thought it was all unicorn farts and rainbows. But I also know that it could have been a lot worse. Casa could have been like High Impact, Casa could have been more like a prison and could have been a LOT more abusive. That's what I'm saying my experience at the place was. It wasn't perfect, but I walked away without negative scars. It helped me realize I was worth doing good in life.
I wasn't happy when I was in my lower level family, but that was because I hadn't taken what I was meant to take from the seminars and the rules. Sure, it was borderline brainwashing, but the kids who were smart enough were able to learn from it the right way. I was put in R and R (“Room Restraint”) once, for about a week. It sucked, but it was nothing compared to what I could have been put through in prison. They just made me sit there and be quiet. I was going down a pretty shitty path before, I probably would have been put in prison for abusing my mother. And it took this violent slap to the face for me to realize it. I read all the negative stuff about how Casa was some sort of fucking teen gulag, and I shake my head. It was bad, it deprived us of a normal teenage-dom, but it honestly wasn't anything illegal. I think the people who say they were abused and that this place was so horrific that the people who made the seminars should be put on trial are overreacting. I'm definitely not a brainwashed idiot, but I don't think I would have chosen any differently. I was one of the few who CHOSE to go to the program. My mom told me about it, and I willingly went there. I'm not giving the program all the credit, but like I say, it was the slap in the face I needed to be able to turn my life around on my own. Before going to the program, I wasn't suicidal, but I really didn't think I deserved to live. I thought that all the kids who made fun of me were right and that I was a horrible person. I was also undiagnosed bipolar. If I hadn't gone to the program, I could have ended up in a mental institution, somewhere that I REALLY could have gotten abused, REALLY gotten restrained. So what if I spent a month in worksheets straight? I got four years of high school done in two. The methods were a bit on the extreme side, but if I hadn't gone, who knows what turns my life would have taken. I credit the program for being the wake-up call that I needed to realize that I wasn't a lousy sack of shit and to take control of my own life. I know there was abuse in other programs run by WWASP, but in the over two years I spent there, the worst treatment I received was disrespect. And if not for the things I learned, I would still feel like I was a worthless piece of shit, and I can almost guarantee that I'd still be undiagnosed bipolar, and that I'd probably be in a mental ward or prison for doing something despicable. No, Casa itself didn't save my life, but it gave me the time to really look, to REALLY delve deep into what I was doing and how I was feeling and what choices I was making for my life. It gave me that time, cliche as it is, to "stop" and "choose" something different. If I'd continued on in "normal" life, perhaps the doors I've currently gone through in my life never would have opened because I never would have stopped and looked for them. So no, Casa itself didn't save my life. But it helped me to save my own.
High Impact was abuse, yes, I won't deny that. I've done a lot of delving into the information about Casa & High Impact, but I honestly don't think that there's any reason for me to, for example, be any sort of a part of a class action lawsuit towards Casa. I didn't get abused. I have heard stories of the bad shit that happened on the boys side, and I respect whatever they want to do to get closure from that. I honestly don't see it as dehumanizing, they did it to bring us all down to the same level, because I know a lot of us had superiority complexes or thought we were hot shit or something. To take away all personalizations helps us to get down to the root of who we REALLY are. I'm not talking about High Impact at all. I don't connect that to Casa other than the fact that I know a couple of people--like you--were sent there FROM Casa. I also never said it was perfect, so don't think that I thought it was all unicorn farts and rainbows. But I also know that it could have been a lot worse. Casa could have been like High Impact, Casa could have been more like a prison and could have been a LOT more abusive. That's what I'm saying my experience at the place was. It wasn't perfect, but I walked away without negative scars. It helped me realize I was worth doing good in life.